Loading ...from Treatise for the Elderly
One time at the start of my old age when the laughter of the Old Said was being transformed into the weeping of the New Said, supposing me still to be the Old Said, the worldly in Ankara invited me there, and I went. At the close of autumn I climbed to the top of the citadel, which was far more aged, dilapidated, and worn out than me. It seemed to me to be formed of petrified historical events. The old age of the season of the year together with my old age, the citadel’s old age, mankind’s old age, the old age of the glorious Ottoman State and the death of the Caliphate’s rule, and the world’s old age all caused me to look in a most grieved, compassionate and melancholy state in that lofty citadel at the valleys of the past and the mountains of the future. As I experienced an utterly black state of mind in Ankara encompassed by four or five layers of the darknesses of old age one within the other*, I sought a light, a solace, a hope.
*. My state of mind at that time prompted me to write a supplication in Persian. It was printed in Ankara, in a treatise entitled, Hubab.
As I sought consolation looking to the right, that is, to the past, my father and forefathers and the human race appeared in the form of a vast grave and filled me with gloom rather than consoling me. Seeking a remedy I looked to the future, which was my left. I saw that it appeared as a huge, dark grave for myself, my contemporaries, and future generations; it produced horror in place of familiarity. Feeling desolate in the face of the left and right, I looked at the present day. It appeared to my heedless and historical eye as a coffin bearing my half-dead, suffering and desperately struggling corpse. Then, despairing from that direction as well, I raised my head and looked at the top of the tree of my life, and saw that the tree bore only a single fruit, and that was my corpse; it stood at the top of the tree and was watching me. Feeling horror at this direction, too, I bowed my head. I looked to the foot of the tree of my life, to its roots, and saw that the soil there, the earth which was the source of my creation and the dust of my bones mixed together, was being trampled underfoot. That was no remedy, rather it added further pain to my affliction.
Then I was forced to look behind me. I saw that this unstable, transient world was tumbling, disappearing into the valleys of nothingness and the darkness of non-existence. While seeking a salve for my pain, it only added poison. Since I could see no good in that direction I looked in front of me, I sent forward my view to the future. I saw that the door of the grave was to be seen open right in the middle of my path, it was watching me with its mouth open. The highway beyond it which stretched away to eternity, and the convoys travelling that highway struck the eye from the distance. And apart from a limited, partial power of choice as my support and defensive weapon in the face of the horrors coming from these six directions, I had nothing else.
Since the partial power of choice, man’s only weapon against those innumerable enemies and endless harmful things, is both defective, and short, and weak, and lacks the power to create, man is capable of nothing apart from acquisition. I could neither pass to the past in order to silence the sorrows which came to me from there, nor could I penetrate the future to prevent the fears which came from there. I saw that there was no benefit in my hopes and pains concerning the past and future.
At the time I was struggling in the horror, desolation, darkness and despair coming from these six directions, the lights of belief which shine in the sky of the Qur’an of Miraculous Exposition suddenly came to my assistance. They lit up and illuminated those six directions to such a degree that if the terrors and darkness I had seen increased a hundredfold, that light would still have been sufficient to meet them. It transformed all those horrors one by one into solace and the desolation into familiarity. It was as follows:
Belief rent asunder the desolate view of the past as a vast grave, and showed it with utter certainty to be a familiar and enlightened gathering of friends.
And belief showed the future, which had appeared in the form of a huge grave to my heedless eyes, to be most certainly a banquet of the Most Merciful One in delightful palaces of bliss.
And belief rent the view of present time as a coffin, as it had appeared to my heedless view, and showed it with certainty to be a place of trade for the Hereafter and a glittering guest-house of the All Merciful One.
And belief showed with utter certainty that the only fruit at the top of the tree of life was not a corpse as had appeared to my neglectful eye, rather, that my spirit, which would manifest eternal life and was designated for eternal happiness, would leave its wom out home to travel around the stars.
And belief showed through the mystery of belief that my bones and the earth which was the source of my creation were not valueless pulverized bones trampled underfoot, rather, that the soil was the door to Divine Mercy and a veil before the hall of Paradise.
And belief showed through the mystery of the Qur’an that the world which had appeared to my heedless eye behind me as tumbling into nothingness and non-existence to consist of missives of the Eternally Besought One and pages of decorations and embroideries glorifying God which had completed their duties, stated their meanings, and left their results in existence in their place. It made known with complete certainty what the true nature of the world is.
And belief showed through the light of the Qur’an that the grave which would open its eyes and look at me in the future was not the door of a well, rather, that it was the door to the world of light, and that the highway which stretched to eternity beyond the grave led not to nothingness and non-existence, but to existence, a place of light, and eternal bliss. Since belief demonstrated this to a degree which afforded utter conviction, it was both a remedy and a salve for my afflictions.
And in place of a very minor ability to receive, belief puts a document into the hand of the limited, partial power of choice so that it may rely on an infinite Power and be connected to a boundless Mercy in the face of those innumerable enemies and layers of darkness. Indeed, belief is a document in the hand of the partial power of choice. And although this human weapon of partial choice, is in itself both short, and powerless, and deficient, just as when a soldier utilizes his partial strength on account of the state, he performs duties far exceeding his own strength, so too through the mystery of belief, if the limited, partial power of choice is used in the name of Almighty God and in His way, it may gain also a Paradise as broad as five hundred years.
And belief takes from the hands of the body the reins of the partial power of choice, which cannot penetrate to the past and future, and hands them over to the heart and spirit. Since the spirit and heart’s sphere of life is not restricted to present time like the body, and included within it are a great many I years from the past and a great many years from the future, the partial power of choice ceases being partial and acquires universality. Just as through the strength of belief it may enter the deepest valleys of the past and repel the darkness of its sorrows, so also with the light of belief it may rise as far as the farthest mountains of the future, and remove its fears.
And so my elderly brothers and sisters who are suffering the difficulties of old age like myself! Since, praise be to God, we are believers, and in belief there are this many luminous, pleasurable, agreeable, and gratifying treasures; and since our old age impels us even more to the contents of the treasure, for sure, rather than complaining about old age accompanied by belief, we should offer endless thanks.
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